None of the citations from the Hadith matter. The Quran is the authority as it came through Muhammed and the Hadith did not. None of those citations are suppored by the Quran. I again stress review of the link I posted above.
Regarding the two verses provided that ARE from the Quran. 4:34 and 35 says,
"Hushands should take good care of their wives, with the bounties God has given to some more than others and with what they spend out of their own money. Righteous wives are devout and guard what God would have then guard in their husbands absence. If you fear high-handedness from your wives, remind them of the teachings of God, then ignore them when you go to bed, then hit them. If they obey you you have no right to act against them: God is most high and great."
The word translated 'High-handedness' is Nashaza from which Nushuz is derived means 'to become high, to rise. This high handedness is also condemned for husbands in verse 128. The word applies to situations where a person assumes a sense of superiority over the other. The Quran here directs a husband to use a slap as the LAST resort to such high handed behavior and to first try lovingly reminding them of God. Then in verse 128 this same sense of superiority is condemned for men as well, further showing than man and woman are viewed not as one superior to the other but as equal. This also flies in the face of the hadith, which is not from Muhammed and full of garbage.
38:44, "'Take a small bunch of grass in your hand, and strike her with that so as not to break your oath...'"
to what oath was this referring? the footnote reads:
"Quranic commentators explain that, when his wife blasphemed, Job swore that if he recovered from his illness, he would beat her with 100 lashes. When he recovered, however, he regretted his hasty oath, so God gave him this instruction."
so neither one of the verses you've quoted from the Quran actually support mistreatment of women. They encourage avoiding such treatment at all costs, and Job had made an oath he regretted but had to fulfill. So a way out was made that he could do so without causing any harm to his wife.
The hadith and the Quran are different books. One is taken as inspired word from God through Muhammed, which is the Quran. Then Hadith obviously contradicts the Qurans treatment of women, it is therefore false. It did not originate with Muhammed, and Muhammed would not have enjoyed mistreating women for amusement.
@cofty
it does not proscribe beating. A man should treat his wife as most precious according to the Quran. The scenario described in these verses would be like this:
My wife is treating me as some stupid inferior imbecile. She does not listen to anything I say and she demeans me in public and in private. I first appeal to her faith in God to explain how such behavior is wrong. It does not stop. I then deny her her marital due while also reminding her of God and how it's wrong to act superior. She does not stop. Even now, if my wife did this and I tried everything to get through to her that treating me this way is wrong, I would slap her.
The reverse is also true. If I am behaving that way toward her, this is also wrong in the Quran. I, as the husband, may be the head of the house, but I am not SUPERIOR to my wife. Acting as though I am is condemned in the Quran. And in the verses 128 and after if I am treating my wife this way the Quran says its best we part ways.